Today I took a visit to the Seashore again. It's been awhile. I think the last time was a couple of months ago before the weather started to turn cold. Even today the weather was gray and cloudy. The waves were choppy as they toppled one on over the other washing foam up on the rocky shore.
Being by the sea started me thinking about life. Mainly because the ocean draws me closer to God...I feel his presence so strongly while I stand and glance at the massive waters stretching out as far as my eyes can see. And when I think of God...I have no other option but to think of my life. For it is in Christ that I live, I move and I have my being.
Lately I have felt like a failure. So often I go through these times. Times when I seem to fail God over and over and then finally I come to the place where I run to him and lift up my hands in surrender once more. Being back in the States has caused me to question once again what my purpose is...what God's purpose and plan is for my life. Seemingly things don't seem to be happening in my world that would indicate that I serve any purpose at the moment. It is during these times of lack of a sense of purpose when I start to unnecessarily feel sorry for myself and slip into this "poor me" attitude which only causes me to drift farther from God and his purpose.
Thank God he is not finished with me yet. I'm not perfect. And when I visit the seashore God seems to drop something in my heart. Sometimes it doesn't come right away; sometimes it does. Today he used something I wrote a few years ago to illustrate what he wanted to drop in my heart.
It was a a story I started to write in 2007. Let me share it with you:
Cliff of Praise,
In the morning light she stood there on a hill. With an umbrella to shield the sun in her right hand and binoculars in the other she glanced down at the sight before her. Dressed in a black cotton dress, an orange scarf about her neck and matching gloves on her hands she hoped she wouldn't be spotted by one of her companions. Her black hat with an attached piece of red silk was another item of clothing she'd purposely put on that morning so that she would be inconspicuous. She never wore hats and nobody would give her a second glance when they saw the hat atop her head.
Solitude. That is what Miss Eliza Price had escaped from the Bed and Breakfast for that morning. Just a few moments to herself so that she could clear her mind of the thoughts that had tormented her of late. That was all that she desired. Surrounded by her dear old aunts who had accompanied her to Italy was no place a person could spend time heart searching.
Early that morning, when Jaimieson, Marilyn, Laura and Elizabeth were still sound asleep in their bedrooms, after a long day at the beach the day before, Eliza slipped from her own room on the second floor of the B&B. As quietly as possible she tip-toed past the doors of the two bedrooms occupied by her companions. At one point, as she neared the stairs, the floor creaked beneath her feet and then there was a sound of someone stirring from the first door along the hall. At that moment Eliza made a run for it down the stairs and through the foyer finally exiting the B&B before she could be discovered.
Pausing to smell the lovely roses planted outside the building, she quickly headed toward the worn path that wound around the corner to the right. As she followed the path it led her to the edge of a cliff. Below were colorful stone buildings built into the rocky hillside.
She stood there glancing down at the hillside that was so scattered with buildings and the incredible clear blue water at the bottom. She put her binoculars to her eyes and noticed boats of every shape and size coming and going. At this moment she felt as if she were on top of the world spying on the goings on of those below.
The time and place was perfect for her to reflect upon her recent thoughts and to search her heart for some answers. Being near the rocky cliffs below and the calm Ocean water spread out as far as her eyes could see gave her a sense of God's peace. God was here with her and she could now let go of all her fears and all of her...
Wait. What was that she heard? Eliza heard footsteps behind her coming from the path she'd just walked herself moments ago. She waited. Maybe the intruder would recognize a woman basking in the presence of God and respectfully walk on. No, that was not to be. The footsteps grew louder and she noted the very moment they stopped.
FOr a moment she closed her eyes imagining that she could somehow will the intruder to leave her side. She need only to turn her head and see the person who had stopped at the edge of the cliff next to her. Finally she opened her eyes and moved them from where they lay ahead to her left. A stranger. Indeed, she had never laid eyes on this person who stood closer than she had realized. As she stared at his profile she noticed that the stranger's eyes remained focused on the hillside below. Maybe the stranger was blind and knew this spot only by memory.
A few moments passed and the stranger still had not glanced once in Eliza's direction. Feeling that the perfect moment for reflection had long passed Eliza shuffled her feet about to turn and head back down the path toward the B&B. At that moment the stranger spoke.
"God delights in the praises of his people!"
This statement, although familiar, startled Eliza.
"You know I'm here?" she questioned out loud.
Not desiring to be rude and disrespectful, Eliza's hand flew to her mouth surprised at her own bluntness.
Smiling graciously at Eliza the stranger continued, "The Lord delights in the praises of His people, but sometimes in our ignorance we do not honor him with our praise. When we focus our attention on ourselves and not upon our creator we offer nothing for the Lord to delight in. Do you know what happens when His people do not praise Him, ma'am?"
It was at this moment, as she opened her mouth to respond, that Eliza saw not a stranger before her and certainly not an angel but a man of God carrying a message. In the midst of her new perception of this man, she could not find the words to answer his question. The question was directed to her, she knew that. There was nobody else around to answer and his eyes were fixed on her and her alone.
Once again he smiled at her holding her gaze only a moment before going on.
"The Rocks cry out." He watched Eliza's face as she glanced down at the rocks on the hillside. "Yes, even these rocks, ma'am. You see, even though the Lord delights most of all in the praises of his people he is such a great and mighty God that if we do not do so, something must proclaim the greatness of the Lord.
"Often times when I'm tempted to pine over my circumstances and have myself a pity-party I run to this here spot. When I look down at these rocks below I realize that even though they are so mighty and strong and the very appearance of them declares how great God is, it is my praise in which the Lord delights. The Lord is always worthy of praise even when I may not feel like praising him. But, do you want to know what happens when I praise God even when I'm not feeling up to it?"
His eyes were smiling now and Eliza couldn't help smiling herself as she nodded. There was a fascination about the man who stood before her speaking words of wisdom and knowledge. She only wished she knew where he came from.
Seeing her nod the man turned his face back to the sight before them. The sun brightened his expression as he spoke his next words, "The Lord lifts me up above my circumstances. There's times I'm praising God right here on this cliff and I feel I could jump off the ground and sore above the hillside below. He truly blesses our obedience to praise him even when our act of obedience is a sacrifice."
For a moment the two of them stood side by side in silence, each quietly praising the Lord in their hearts.
So today God dropped in my heart that I should praise him...even when I don't feel him...even when the circumstances of life are seemingly hopeless offering no signs of purpose. Our greatest purpose is to Praise God! Psalm 150:6, Let everything that hath breath praise the Lord. Praise ye the Lord.
Thursday, 4 November 2010
Monday, 25 October 2010
Sing unto the Lord!
Psalm 100
Make a joyful noise unto the Lord, all ye lands. Serve the Lord with gladness, come before his presence with singing. Know ye that the Lord he is God: it is he that hath made us, and not we ourselves; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture.
Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise: be thankful unto him, and bless his name. For the Lord is good; his mercy is everlasting; and his truth endureth to all generations.
Psalm 96:1-4
O Sing unto the Lord a new song: sing unto the Lord, all the earth. Sing unto the Lord, bless his name; shew forth his salvation from day to day. Declare his glory among the heathen, his wonders among all people. For the Lord is great, and greatly to be praised: he is to be feared above all gods.
1 Chronicles 16:23-26
Sing unto the Lord, all the earth; shew forth from day to day his salvation. Declare his glory among the heathen; his marvellous works among all nations. For great is the LORD, and greatly to be praised: he also is to be feared above all gods. For all the gods of the people are idols: but the Lord made the heavens.
It looks an awful lot like we are to sing unto the Lord and to declare his wonderful works to all people.
Today a friend was telling me about a verse he had been meditating on in 2 Chronicles 16. I flipped through my Bible to find the verse and was looking at verse 23 of 1 Chronicles 16 rather than 2 Chronicles. The funny thing is that I wasn't even in the right verse...even if it was 1 Chronicles. Later on this evening I wanted to turn to the scripture he really was referencing to 2 Chronicles 16:9. Again, my eyes were caught by this verse in 1 Chronicles 16.
A few minutes later I was reading from the passages in my One Year Bible. The reading from the Psalms today was Psalm 95 and 96. I couldn't believe it and I suddenly realized that God was trying to tell me something. :D
I really need to let these verses sink in before I know what God is trying to say to me. One thing I know is that I need to stop being so self-absorbed and look to my creator. After reading all these verses about singing unto the Lord and showing forth his wonderful works I was prompted to go to the ever familiar Psalm 100.
I love when the Psalmist says, "Know ye that the Lord he is God: it is he that hath made us, and not we ourselves; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture."
"it is he that hath made us, not we ourselves" There's so much to take from that one verse. We are fearfully and wonderfully made. God knows our innermost being as much as our outer being. He knows every thought. He's aware of our every intention or motive. He is in control.
What I get from that tid bit is what is also said in Isaiah: His ways are higher than our ways. His thoughts are higher than our thoughts. I spend too much time thinking about what I can do to change things; about what I can do to make God love me more; about what I want for my future. It is God who made me...he can change things with one word as he calmed the storm by saying, "Peace, be still!" No matter what I do, he could never love me any more than what was displayed on the cross. And he has the future all planned out and it is a good future. I get from that statement, "it is he that hath made us, not we ourselves", that I need to stop trusting in myself and start trusting in him ALONE.
I can testify of God moving after I decided to trust him alone for my life, for my future and well for everything. One day I am saying, "It's in your hands", and the next he's changing things in my life that I couldn't change on my own.
"we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture"...sheep have got quite the life. They are led by the shepherd into fields to graze and eat freely until the shepherd leads them to safety at the end of the night. They don't have to worry about their life, food, or shelter. That is how it is with our Great Shepherd. If we yield to his great care we have nothing to worry about. And again...that goes back to trusting God. Trust. It's easier than we think, I think. :D I'm working on it.
God Bless!
Make a joyful noise unto the Lord, all ye lands. Serve the Lord with gladness, come before his presence with singing. Know ye that the Lord he is God: it is he that hath made us, and not we ourselves; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture.
Enter into his gates with thanksgiving, and into his courts with praise: be thankful unto him, and bless his name. For the Lord is good; his mercy is everlasting; and his truth endureth to all generations.
Psalm 96:1-4
O Sing unto the Lord a new song: sing unto the Lord, all the earth. Sing unto the Lord, bless his name; shew forth his salvation from day to day. Declare his glory among the heathen, his wonders among all people. For the Lord is great, and greatly to be praised: he is to be feared above all gods.
1 Chronicles 16:23-26
Sing unto the Lord, all the earth; shew forth from day to day his salvation. Declare his glory among the heathen; his marvellous works among all nations. For great is the LORD, and greatly to be praised: he also is to be feared above all gods. For all the gods of the people are idols: but the Lord made the heavens.
It looks an awful lot like we are to sing unto the Lord and to declare his wonderful works to all people.
Today a friend was telling me about a verse he had been meditating on in 2 Chronicles 16. I flipped through my Bible to find the verse and was looking at verse 23 of 1 Chronicles 16 rather than 2 Chronicles. The funny thing is that I wasn't even in the right verse...even if it was 1 Chronicles. Later on this evening I wanted to turn to the scripture he really was referencing to 2 Chronicles 16:9. Again, my eyes were caught by this verse in 1 Chronicles 16.
A few minutes later I was reading from the passages in my One Year Bible. The reading from the Psalms today was Psalm 95 and 96. I couldn't believe it and I suddenly realized that God was trying to tell me something. :D
I really need to let these verses sink in before I know what God is trying to say to me. One thing I know is that I need to stop being so self-absorbed and look to my creator. After reading all these verses about singing unto the Lord and showing forth his wonderful works I was prompted to go to the ever familiar Psalm 100.
I love when the Psalmist says, "Know ye that the Lord he is God: it is he that hath made us, and not we ourselves; we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture."
"it is he that hath made us, not we ourselves" There's so much to take from that one verse. We are fearfully and wonderfully made. God knows our innermost being as much as our outer being. He knows every thought. He's aware of our every intention or motive. He is in control.
What I get from that tid bit is what is also said in Isaiah: His ways are higher than our ways. His thoughts are higher than our thoughts. I spend too much time thinking about what I can do to change things; about what I can do to make God love me more; about what I want for my future. It is God who made me...he can change things with one word as he calmed the storm by saying, "Peace, be still!" No matter what I do, he could never love me any more than what was displayed on the cross. And he has the future all planned out and it is a good future. I get from that statement, "it is he that hath made us, not we ourselves", that I need to stop trusting in myself and start trusting in him ALONE.
I can testify of God moving after I decided to trust him alone for my life, for my future and well for everything. One day I am saying, "It's in your hands", and the next he's changing things in my life that I couldn't change on my own.
"we are his people, and the sheep of his pasture"...sheep have got quite the life. They are led by the shepherd into fields to graze and eat freely until the shepherd leads them to safety at the end of the night. They don't have to worry about their life, food, or shelter. That is how it is with our Great Shepherd. If we yield to his great care we have nothing to worry about. And again...that goes back to trusting God. Trust. It's easier than we think, I think. :D I'm working on it.
God Bless!
Sunday, 24 October 2010
Update
I am home in Belmont. Funny; how you can make plans and then things change in a blink of an eye.
I'm working at Chase's Daily two days a week and am looking for a full time job for during the week; preferably an admin job. I'm praying for a good paying job that can help me earn enough to be able to get my own apartment. It would be nice if it was somewhere between Belfast and Bangor. I'm hoping to get involved in my home church in Bangor again and it would be nice to be closer so that I can do that.
Tomorrow morning I am going to the bank and will be getting a loan to buy my very first car of my own. My parents bought me a car several years ago and since then it was totaled but still because it was bought by my parents it really never felt like it was mine. This will be my very own car. God has been good. I don't deserve his favor...I'm far from perfect...yet he has given it freely. This car is a part of his plan for the moment...I know that.
I'll tell more later. It's late and I need to be going.
God Bless!
I'm working at Chase's Daily two days a week and am looking for a full time job for during the week; preferably an admin job. I'm praying for a good paying job that can help me earn enough to be able to get my own apartment. It would be nice if it was somewhere between Belfast and Bangor. I'm hoping to get involved in my home church in Bangor again and it would be nice to be closer so that I can do that.
Tomorrow morning I am going to the bank and will be getting a loan to buy my very first car of my own. My parents bought me a car several years ago and since then it was totaled but still because it was bought by my parents it really never felt like it was mine. This will be my very own car. God has been good. I don't deserve his favor...I'm far from perfect...yet he has given it freely. This car is a part of his plan for the moment...I know that.
I'll tell more later. It's late and I need to be going.
God Bless!
Sunday, 26 September 2010
Update
Just a quick update while I'm on here. I've got a part time job at Chase's Daily in Belfast. I am working two days a week, Friday and Saturday. On Fridays I wait tables and on Saturday I work at the front counter. It's a good job that will stretch me and help me develop multi-tasking, time management, and prioritizing skills.
I am praying that I can get another job or two that I enjoy. I'm hoping to go to Brazil in January. If that is the plan then I really need to be making some money to travel there and to have some extra for the first few weeks or even months that I am there.
More than anything else, I want God's will. I want him to lead me in the direction that he wants me to go in.
I am praying that I can get another job or two that I enjoy. I'm hoping to go to Brazil in January. If that is the plan then I really need to be making some money to travel there and to have some extra for the first few weeks or even months that I am there.
More than anything else, I want God's will. I want him to lead me in the direction that he wants me to go in.
Starbucks Wi-Fi
Right now I'm sitting down at the Starbucks on Bangor Mall Boulevard. This morning I went to my parents church in Winterport and was very blessed by the presence of God that was so strong in that place. My Gram went home with my sister and I drove here to Bangor. When I came I saw an old Starbucks co-worker of mine, Tanya G. We spoke briefly, she giving me all the updates on other co-workers and what they are doing now.
A few weeks ago I came in here and found out that Starbucks was now offering Free Wi-Fi. Today I knew that I was going to be in Bangor for the afternoon on my own with nothing to do so I brought my laptop to take advantage of that Starbucks customer perk. It just makes me love Starbucks even more. :D
Anyway. So I sat down first of all in a place where there were no electrical outlets. While I waited for someone to move I ate my Cinnamon swirl coffee cake and started drinking my Grande mocha. About fifteen minutes went by and two girls near an outlet on the wall left and I took their place. It was a table of four and at first I felt a little funny taking the whole table for myself...but it was my only option.
A few minutes later there was a man on a mission who came into the store with a laptop in under his arm ardently searching for a place to sit...I could tell that he was looking for a place next to an outlet. He came to where I was sitting and with an urgent thick foreign accent said, "I'm sorry, do you mind if I sit here. This is the only place with an outlet and I need it." And I said, "Sure".
He pulled out his cup of coffee and a big container of Nutella and began spooning the nutella. It was funny. He has the space around his laptop filled up with bags full of cds and an external hard drive.
Before he began digging into his nutella he got up to get a spoon. While he was away momentarily the guy at the table behind his chair looked at his stuff and then I caught his eye. He chuckled and said, "There was an outlet in that corner. I think he saw it. It's strange."
We were both minding our own business when all of a sudden he picked up his cell phone, dialed it and then my phone rang. haha. It was as if he was calling me. Obviously he wasn't but it was funny anyway. His phone call ended up being a conversation in another language. It sounded like a Slavic language similar to Bulgarian. My phone call was in English and it ended up being my best friend, Kristina.
Anyway...I think that this is hilarious. When I go to a cafe in Glasgow, Scotland or one in Bangor, Maine, USA I end up bumping into people from another country. They are drawn to me. Hahahahaha.
Well, I think that is all I'm going to write about right now. I'm going to go back to surfing the net.
A few weeks ago I came in here and found out that Starbucks was now offering Free Wi-Fi. Today I knew that I was going to be in Bangor for the afternoon on my own with nothing to do so I brought my laptop to take advantage of that Starbucks customer perk. It just makes me love Starbucks even more. :D
Anyway. So I sat down first of all in a place where there were no electrical outlets. While I waited for someone to move I ate my Cinnamon swirl coffee cake and started drinking my Grande mocha. About fifteen minutes went by and two girls near an outlet on the wall left and I took their place. It was a table of four and at first I felt a little funny taking the whole table for myself...but it was my only option.
A few minutes later there was a man on a mission who came into the store with a laptop in under his arm ardently searching for a place to sit...I could tell that he was looking for a place next to an outlet. He came to where I was sitting and with an urgent thick foreign accent said, "I'm sorry, do you mind if I sit here. This is the only place with an outlet and I need it." And I said, "Sure".
He pulled out his cup of coffee and a big container of Nutella and began spooning the nutella. It was funny. He has the space around his laptop filled up with bags full of cds and an external hard drive.
Before he began digging into his nutella he got up to get a spoon. While he was away momentarily the guy at the table behind his chair looked at his stuff and then I caught his eye. He chuckled and said, "There was an outlet in that corner. I think he saw it. It's strange."
We were both minding our own business when all of a sudden he picked up his cell phone, dialed it and then my phone rang. haha. It was as if he was calling me. Obviously he wasn't but it was funny anyway. His phone call ended up being a conversation in another language. It sounded like a Slavic language similar to Bulgarian. My phone call was in English and it ended up being my best friend, Kristina.
Anyway...I think that this is hilarious. When I go to a cafe in Glasgow, Scotland or one in Bangor, Maine, USA I end up bumping into people from another country. They are drawn to me. Hahahahaha.
Well, I think that is all I'm going to write about right now. I'm going to go back to surfing the net.
Thursday, 16 September 2010
Extraordinary Quote
To laugh often and much; to win the respect of intelligent people and affection of children; to earn the appreciation of honest critics and endure the betrayal of false friends; to appreciate beauty; to find the best in others; to leave the world a bit better, whether by a healthy child, a garden patch or a redeemed social condition; to know even one life has breathed easier because you have lived. This is to have succeeded - Ralph Waldo Emerson
Monday, 13 September 2010
Back in the States
Back in the States...
Well, another year has come and gone. On July 7th I returned back to Maine from nearly a year being in Glasgow, Scotland for the second year in a row. Judy Petros recently asked what I learned while I was in Scotland this past year and I said, “I learned a lot!” She then asked me a very good question, “What was the most outstanding thing that you learned this year?”
This year was very different than the year before in Scotland. My time in Glasgow from June ’08 – May ’09 I was not alone. I shared a three bedroom flat (apartment) with three other missionaries. We were all there for the same reason and we served as wonderful support systems for each other. We all went out into the big bad world of the city of Glasgow as a team and then returned to our humble abode where we could encourage one another in the Lord, where we shared daily devotions, where we rejoiced with each in our victories, where we exhorted one another when one of us was going astray and where we shared in our excitement as we learned how to better evangelise the lost as well as minister to fellow Christians in Glasgow.
My time in Glasgow from August ’09 – July ’10, as I said before, was very different. I went for the second year in a row to continue to give my help and service to the International Missions End Times Church, New Mercy Church (www.newmercy.org.uk). At the same time, due to difficulties of entering the country for any other reason, I was studying full time at a local college there in Glasgow. My accommodation was at a Student Accommodation where I shared a five ensuite bedroom flat with four other girls. We all studied at different College/Universities in Glasgow. Three of those girls had already been living in the flat for at least three years.
When I first moved into the flat, I had a very difficult time adjusting and making myself feel comfortable in my new surroundings. It was also very difficult to go from living with likeminded Christians who all had the same focus as a missionary to living with all lost people. Even at College I was the only Christian in a sea of many lost souls. To be very frank and honest, I felt very alone at times.
At first because of the great difference between the situation of this year and the last, I questioned, “Am I really a missionary?” I can’t count the times I felt so insecure with my flatmates that I questioned my ability to be a witness to them. I did so want to be an example, but I found myself many times hiding in my room. This happened especially on occasions when my flatmates would invite people over for parties. This, too, was very different for me.
As I said, I questioned, “Am I really a missionary? What am I doing here? I don’t feel like a missionary at all. I’m not doing anything different here than I could be doing at home.” This troubled me so. But one day God showed me something. I don’t remember how or when but it was so real. He showed me that it didn’t matter where I was or what I was doing, whether I was holding a position in a church or attending college while serving at a local church somewhere. One thing I kept saying to myself before was, “I felt more like a missionary last year.” But God showed me that living smack dab in the middle of the lost made me more of a missionary than I ever was the year before. I realized that what mattered was that I be a light in the darkness no matter what!
I learned a valuable lesson this past year. We are all ministers, no matter where God sends us, no matter what we may become, no matter what our profession, no matter if we preach from a pulpit or stand up for right in a flat full of wild, young partiers. We are all ministers of the Gospel and we all have a mission field and that is in the place that we find ourselves.
This year was a test of obedience to the call, many times a test of trusting God, and toward the end even a test of faith IN God but as I briefly testified on Sunday morning, “God is good!” He has to be. I’ve gone and come and I know he holds the future. I want to thank everyone who prayed for me. It was not in vain.
I am thankful because although I won’t be returning to Scotland long term I still have good connections with New Mercy Church there in Glasgow. While in Glasgow I was transcribing Pastor Mike McKeever’s sermon series’ which were edited and published into several books. Today I continue to transcribe his sermons. That is something I can do wherever I am.
At the moment I have been blessed with a part time job at a Vegetarian Restaurant in Belfast, Maine. I’m going to be looking for another part time job – maybe a couple more. The next step, God willing, I will be going to Brazil. For a few years now my friend, Rod de Freitas, has been inviting me to come and teach in one of his English Schools called, JET Incorporated (www.jetincorporated.com.br).
This past Summer I helped Rod with the production of one of his own English books that is used as part of the English material in the JET schools. The wonderful thing about these books is that they have scripture throughout that can be used as a tool to share the Gospel with the students that study at JET. We also worked on the videos that will go along with the books and assist with the learning process. At the end of each unit of each book there is a video with a pastor giving a two minute sermon. This is wonderful because most of the people who study at JET are unsaved. The program goes on for several years which mean that as teachers in JET relationships are made with the students. And with these relationships there is the opportunity to share the Gospel with these students.
It is a wonderful project that I am very happy to be a part of. If it works out for me to go to Brazil in January then I will probably be teaching in one of these schools at some point. Until then I am back in the States and very happy to see friends and family.
Well, another year has come and gone. On July 7th I returned back to Maine from nearly a year being in Glasgow, Scotland for the second year in a row. Judy Petros recently asked what I learned while I was in Scotland this past year and I said, “I learned a lot!” She then asked me a very good question, “What was the most outstanding thing that you learned this year?”
This year was very different than the year before in Scotland. My time in Glasgow from June ’08 – May ’09 I was not alone. I shared a three bedroom flat (apartment) with three other missionaries. We were all there for the same reason and we served as wonderful support systems for each other. We all went out into the big bad world of the city of Glasgow as a team and then returned to our humble abode where we could encourage one another in the Lord, where we shared daily devotions, where we rejoiced with each in our victories, where we exhorted one another when one of us was going astray and where we shared in our excitement as we learned how to better evangelise the lost as well as minister to fellow Christians in Glasgow.
My time in Glasgow from August ’09 – July ’10, as I said before, was very different. I went for the second year in a row to continue to give my help and service to the International Missions End Times Church, New Mercy Church (www.newmercy.org.uk). At the same time, due to difficulties of entering the country for any other reason, I was studying full time at a local college there in Glasgow. My accommodation was at a Student Accommodation where I shared a five ensuite bedroom flat with four other girls. We all studied at different College/Universities in Glasgow. Three of those girls had already been living in the flat for at least three years.
When I first moved into the flat, I had a very difficult time adjusting and making myself feel comfortable in my new surroundings. It was also very difficult to go from living with likeminded Christians who all had the same focus as a missionary to living with all lost people. Even at College I was the only Christian in a sea of many lost souls. To be very frank and honest, I felt very alone at times.
At first because of the great difference between the situation of this year and the last, I questioned, “Am I really a missionary?” I can’t count the times I felt so insecure with my flatmates that I questioned my ability to be a witness to them. I did so want to be an example, but I found myself many times hiding in my room. This happened especially on occasions when my flatmates would invite people over for parties. This, too, was very different for me.
As I said, I questioned, “Am I really a missionary? What am I doing here? I don’t feel like a missionary at all. I’m not doing anything different here than I could be doing at home.” This troubled me so. But one day God showed me something. I don’t remember how or when but it was so real. He showed me that it didn’t matter where I was or what I was doing, whether I was holding a position in a church or attending college while serving at a local church somewhere. One thing I kept saying to myself before was, “I felt more like a missionary last year.” But God showed me that living smack dab in the middle of the lost made me more of a missionary than I ever was the year before. I realized that what mattered was that I be a light in the darkness no matter what!
I learned a valuable lesson this past year. We are all ministers, no matter where God sends us, no matter what we may become, no matter what our profession, no matter if we preach from a pulpit or stand up for right in a flat full of wild, young partiers. We are all ministers of the Gospel and we all have a mission field and that is in the place that we find ourselves.
This year was a test of obedience to the call, many times a test of trusting God, and toward the end even a test of faith IN God but as I briefly testified on Sunday morning, “God is good!” He has to be. I’ve gone and come and I know he holds the future. I want to thank everyone who prayed for me. It was not in vain.
I am thankful because although I won’t be returning to Scotland long term I still have good connections with New Mercy Church there in Glasgow. While in Glasgow I was transcribing Pastor Mike McKeever’s sermon series’ which were edited and published into several books. Today I continue to transcribe his sermons. That is something I can do wherever I am.
At the moment I have been blessed with a part time job at a Vegetarian Restaurant in Belfast, Maine. I’m going to be looking for another part time job – maybe a couple more. The next step, God willing, I will be going to Brazil. For a few years now my friend, Rod de Freitas, has been inviting me to come and teach in one of his English Schools called, JET Incorporated (www.jetincorporated.com.br).
This past Summer I helped Rod with the production of one of his own English books that is used as part of the English material in the JET schools. The wonderful thing about these books is that they have scripture throughout that can be used as a tool to share the Gospel with the students that study at JET. We also worked on the videos that will go along with the books and assist with the learning process. At the end of each unit of each book there is a video with a pastor giving a two minute sermon. This is wonderful because most of the people who study at JET are unsaved. The program goes on for several years which mean that as teachers in JET relationships are made with the students. And with these relationships there is the opportunity to share the Gospel with these students.
It is a wonderful project that I am very happy to be a part of. If it works out for me to go to Brazil in January then I will probably be teaching in one of these schools at some point. Until then I am back in the States and very happy to see friends and family.
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